I won't answer that ...

Upon arrival in Corsica from Paris, I made the fatal error of asking the car-rental lady at the airport the following question:

Do cell phone calls to Paris cost as the same as in France from here?

I won't answer that, will I? We are IN France here!

Oh, crap - all I ever hear about Corsica is how violent the politics on the island are (turbulent Corsica remains a thorn in the flesh of France's political elite. And the evening scent of Mediterranean pine will occasionally be mixed with the smell of plastic explosive - BBC) and how some government prefét was murdered by the 'autonomistes' and the first person I meet gives me the 'we're IN France' spiel when I'm trying to be culturally sensitive to the fact that I expect everyone on the island to be hopping mad with the French. You just can't win, can you?

Merci, Marianne!

Ever impressed with how French-folk look after their artists I have to report on the following two events:

1. I was sent a notification by the médecine de travail for actors that I need to make an apointment to go for an annual check-up. We have our OWN actor's doctors to look after us and it doesn't cost us an extra centime!

2. I got €1000 worth of holiday pay for last year, deposited directly into my account. There is a 'paid leave' fund for performers. Seeing as we are never employed on solid, long-term contracts that allow you to take paid leave, on every job we do the employer pays a tiny percentage of our salary into the holiday fund and at the end of the year, all the little jobs are added up and voila - I had an unexpected €1000.- drop into my account!

All their annoying habits and inimitable rudeness aside, the Froggies know how to treat their thesps! Thank you, Marianne!

PS No thanks to Mr Sarkozy who wants to shut down France24 and my delightful weather-announcing job. Nicolas has made it clear that he will not approve the spending of government money on channels that broadcast in a foreign language. But, Al Jazeerah has an English channel? And it was so avant-guard of France24 to be broadcast in 3 languages!! Watch this space as we see what unfolds...

PPS I can't believe the rain you folks are having in Jhb, by the way. Lately, EVERY time I am on weather duty there is a lighting bolt over Jozi?! Cape Town gets all the sunbeams!! No fair, man.

How Royal!

After a few weeks in SA, I've returned to a mountain of mail (mostly junk) in France. Inadvertantly, I kept the best for last... I have just opened a royalties cheque from Canal+. A mini-series I had a tiny part in was re-broadcast, and without me even knowing about the re-broadcast let alone having to chase anything up, I just had my royalties sent to me. How cool!

This, ladies and gents, is what the writers in Hollywood are striking for. Their royalties, which studios are refusing them. Plus a reasonable cut of DVD sales (as in, more than 4c a DVD thankyouverymuchiWROTEthebloodyshow/movie/TVseries), that studios and producers are also refusing them. And that deal regarding new media and internet streaming that they're requesting. I'm with the writers all the way...although the WGA strike's timing has a huge impact on my planned trip to LA. So.... Hollywood reporting will be done from Europe for just a tad longer...

Tea-hee

I had the oddest nightmare last night. Dreamt that France was banning herbal teas and once the shops had sold out, there would be no more. So I tore around the city in a panic, trying to pick up as much mint tea as I could find, crying my eyes out that I wouldn't be able to rinse my hair with camomille anymore - ugh, it was horrible and waking up was tough this Monday morning. Pffffffffffffffffff.... I feel like Garfield.

Traffic rules, pools and suicides

Driving and traffic are such omnipresent issues in LA, so I feel we need to talk about car pools and suicide lanes. I have never seen anything like it, although I believe they are testing the carpool lane in South Africa at the moment. But first things first:

A suicide lane is the very middle lane on a lot of multi-lane roads in LA. It is demarcated by double yellow dotted and unbroken lines on either side and
gets its name from the fact that people travelling in either direction can use it.

Basically, the first person to pull into the suicide lane decides which way the traffic flows down it - if you're unlucky, you will have put yourself in a suicidal position - although It's not as dramatic as it sounds. You would normally use it as a slip way to do a left turn, so nobody drives in it for long stretches and you mostly stop dead ('xcuse the pun) in the suicide lane to perform said left turn into a driveway or whatever. It's an interesting concept with a scary name.

A car pool, on the other hand, has no water in it. Just diamond shapes painted on the tarmac and loads of signs warning of a minimum fine of $271 for abuse. (Why specifically two-hundred and seventy-ONE Dollars, I have no idea.) It is the far left lane on the highway and it can only be used if there are two or more people travelling in the same vehicle. It is blocked off from the rest of the highway by thick lines of paint, with occasional gaps for entering and leaving the lane.
What's amazing about that is that people actually respect those painted stripes. I was in a car with someone when I suddenly realised we were eligible for the car pool lane and wanted to shoot over the lines at a non-entry point. The friend I was with vehemently discouraged that and so I had to wait for the next break in the lines.

In France, you would need a knee-high concrete wall to stop people from weaving in and out of the car pool lane at will, and even then you can't be sure some reckless youth wouldn't just try to ramp it anyway! Quite apart from the fact that you would NEVER be able to persuade the French to respect the "2 or more people only" rule of access.

Now I'm so paranoid about doing anything wrong in the car pool lane that I was in a state of high anxiety whilst using it in rush hour traffic with a friend who was napping on the back seat of his car. I kept freaking out, asking him to "please sit up!" so everyone could see I wasn't cheating! Of course, he was quite grumpy about having to interrupt his nap and "sit up for the cameras" and kept saying, "They have to pull you over before they can fine you!", but I was certain they would just take a picture of me (with what camera I don't know, but I suspect traffic cops to be capable of miracles after my disappearing sign board incident) and then HOW was I going to prove I had a sleeping passenger in the back?

Speaking of which, Santa Monica rescinded my parking ticket from last year, but failed to inform me of that by letter or carrier pigeon or any other means of communication and have obviously not come through in the refund department either. Two phone calls and one 'urgent request for refund' later and I'm still waiting.... (luckily not holding my breath, mind you)